Learn why jokes about therapy tend to miss the point of counseling and the job of the therapist in helping people through their problems.
Sometimes I feel like a used car salesman. Or like I’m walking around complaining, “I don’t get no respect.”
A friend once told me therapists remind him of divorce lawyers: always trying to milk the clients for more money. The good ones, he said, don’t make much. They cure folks and send them off. The bad therapists keep clients coming back forever.
As if I am somehow in control of whether or not clients change.
I know that I am sensitive about these jokes. I feel I must defend myself, my profession, and my clients’ decisions. These folks are not dumb – they are wise, successful people. They wouldn’t pay me money unless they received some value from our work together.
Plus, my friend forgot one other angle to the argument. Maybe the client is so thrilled with what they receive in exchange for their money, they keep coming back. Because they actually want continued growth.
Counseling Isn’t about “Fixing” People, But Helping Them Along the Journey
Maybe the lights are finally on in the client’s “house,” and they see other rooms that could use some touching up. They realize they want to go deeper into knowing themselves. Their lives improve, so they don’t feel a need to stop the growth.
This is one of many reasons. There are a thousand as to why clients might stay longer in therapy.
Let me assure you: no therapist gets rich milking clients.
Still, jokes abound – and we are left without societal respect. We are the janitors, cleaning up other people’s messes and cultural stains every day in our office. No one wants to look at the disarray – no one really wants to see any of the pain.
People come seeking love, a listening heart, acceptance, approval, perfection. People arrive starving from a culture that’s fed them the belief that you deserve everything you want. A culture that’s taught them to worship what’s outside rather than what’s inside.
Our job is to stand by their side while they process the reality of what their life is… and what it might possibly become. And guide them along their utterly unique, personal journey.
So the world can make jokes about therapists if it wants to. But I know who I am and what I provide. I know that we’re doing valuable work, one hour, one session, one week at a time.